OK, so EastEnders has decided to do its own mini horse meat scandal, five years after it would have been topical! And funny! Not even The Simpsons waits that long to try and parody something! Thankfully, Only Connect is never bound by those issues, it is timeless, although a few questions from the early series are likely out of date by now.
Anyway, playing the second elimination match last night were the Detectives, Ian King, Tim Harrison and Captain Tim Hall, who have beaten the Theatricals and the Arrowheads, but lost to the Escapologists, and the Beaks, Rob Cromarty, Aidan Sproat-Clements and captain Dan Sproat-Clements, who beat the Disparates and the Dandies in the earlier rounds, but were overcome by the Belgophiles.
Round 1. The Detectives kicked the proceedings off with Water: 'Putt's Law', then 'Dunning-Kruger Effect', then 'Peter Principle'; they offered 'psychological interpretations based on a person's intelligence', which was close enough, the actual link being psychology about incompetence. The Beaks opened their account with Eye of Horus, and the picture set: we saw a teacup and saucer, then a chest of drawers, then a demisemiquaver; they suggested 'demi', as were correct, the first two being 'demitasse' and 'demilune'. The Detectives chose Twisted Flax next: 'Denmark, Iceland and Greenland', then 'Korea, South Korea and Japan', then 'Palk, India and Sri Lanka'; they offered 'used to be one entity', not correct. Their opponents saw 'Hormuz, Iran and Oman', but couldn't pick up: they are straits and their locations. The Beaks chose Lion next: 'Phone driver', then 'Ed Towers', then 'Loin'; they came in at this point with 'anagrams of the Only Connect hieroglyphs', and collected two points! Excellent set! (Victoria proceded to reel off some more possible clues there!) The Detectives chose Two Reeds next, and got the music set: we heard 'Dolphins' by Tim Buckley, then 'Where Have All the Cowboys Gone?' (sadly not Apu's version!), then Elton John with 'Bennie and the Jets', and finally 'When The Saints Go Marching In'. They saw them to all have NFL teams in their names, and collected a point. Left with Horned Viper, the Beaks saw 'The Butterfly Lion', then 'Gangsta Granny'; they came in here with 'David Walliums novels', but were not correct. Their opponents saw 'The Selfish Giant' and 'Charlotte's Web', but could not get it right: they are children's stories in which the title characters dies. At the end of the first round, the Beaks led 4-3.
Round 2, What Comes Fourth? The Detectives opened the round with Eye of Horus: 'Banking and insurance company formed in 2001', then 'American cable channel', and then 'Standard writing pencil'. They saw them to be 'HBOS', 'HBO' and 'HB', so offered 'Hydrogen', as in 'H', for the points. The Beaks chose Water next: 'Parietal', then 'Clavicles'; they identified the first clues as 'Head' and 'Shoulders', so offered 'Metatarsals', as in 'Toes', for the points. The Detectives chose Lion next: 'Tom Snyder', then 'Craig Kilborn', and then 'Craig Ferguson'. They offered 'James Corden', the sequence being hosts of The Late Late Show, and were correct for two points. The Beaks chose 'Horn-ed' Viper next, and got the picture set: we saw a woodland scene accompanied by 1974, then Major Gowan from Fawlty Towers alongside 1997; they saw it to be something to do with prime ministers, but their buzz at this point was not correct. Their opponents saw a map with The Hague highlighted, but also had nothing to offer. The sequence is Conservative leaders who lost a general election, so something for 'Howard', such as 'Howard the duck', alongside 2005, would suffice. (The first clue being 'Heath' of course) For their final choice, the Detecives chose Two Reeds: '1-10: 4', then '11-20: 4'; they offered '31-40: 2', and were correct, the sequence being the number of prime numbers in those ranges. ('21-30: 2' would be third) Left with Twisted Flax, the Beaks saw 'My Fair Lady', then 'The Sound of Music', and then 'Oliver!'. They offered 'Chicago', and were right, the sequence being musicals that have won the Best Picture Oscar. (Of course, had La La Land actually won last year, this would be a different sequence!) At the end of the second round, the Detectives led 10-9.
On to the Walls. The Beaks went first this time, and chose to tackle the Lion wall. Despite identifying some possible links, isolating sets proved easier said than done. Eventually, they isolated 'Cover', 'Gully', 'Point' and 'Long on', which are cricket fielding positions, followed shortly by 'Ditch', 'Gutter', 'Culvert' and 'Channel', which are water conduits. They couldn't get the rest in their three goes though, and had to retrieve bonuses: 'Catcher', 'Slip', 'Pat' and 'Boy' can all follow 'Cow', which they didn't see, while 'Trench', 'Butch', 'Creek' and 'Banish' all become a language when the first word is changed, which they also failed to spot. Four there then.
The Detectives could thus widen the gap if they could better that on the Water wall. They had their first set pretty quickly: 'Lilac', 'Mauve', 'Puce' and 'Plum' are shades of purple. A second set, 'Lily', 'Cucumber', 'Anemone' and 'Gooseberry', which can all follow 'Sea' to give a different organism, followed a short while later. They also came unstuck trying to solve however, and also had to try for bonuses: 'Mary', 'Bend Sinister', 'Pale Fire' and 'Lolita' are novels by Nabokov, which they got, while 'Violet', 'Edith', 'Cora' and 'Isobel' are characters in Downton Abbey, which they also knew. Six there, which upped their lead to 16-13 going into the final round.
So, Missing Vowels would decide the fate of the teams. 'Things you might do if angry', such as 'RANT AND RAVE', and 'SCREAM BLUE MURDER', was split 2-each. 'Long form names of countries' proved hard, with the sides tying 1-each. 'Things people say when shaking hands' went to the Beaks 4-0. 'Old terms for doctors' only had time for one clue, which the Detectives took. The final score: a 20-20 tie!
Haven't had one of those for a while! So, captains only on one clue, first buzz gets only chance to answer. The deciding clue: 'DM NDFY DDM NDF YDNT'. Mr Hall was first in: 'DAMNED IF YOU DO, DAMNED IF YOU DON'T', and was right!
A good close contest, well played both sides there. Unlucky Beaks, but nothing to be ashamed of, a fine series of performances, thanks for playing! Very well done Detectives though, and best of luck in the play-offs!
Next week's match: the Vikings vs the Inquisitors
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